Is Sharing Always Caring?

A wise friend of mine says that sharing has always been his long-time passion. He cannot live without sharing something from his possession. It could be his wealth, his knowledge, his experience, his words, anything.

He feels satisfied and happy and relieved every time he has shared something.

And then I query:" Is that really sharing which shows caring or just an outlet of your selfishness?"

Selfishness that you want to draw some benefits from giving something to others. It may not be bad to other people but if we look inside, does giving make us a better person (a more sincere person) or just a person who loves giving because it feels good. Nothing else matters. It's only about yourself. That's what I mean about selfishness here. But the meaning is way more subtle.

There're times when we feel happy after sharing things, and at this point, try to ask ourselves whether our sharing is faithful to its real objective of giving, i.e. sharing virtue.

We may love sharing because of these following meaning reasons.

Sharing provides us a bunch of PRAISES, a shower of attention and admiration.

Sharing gives us what our ego really needs: ACKNOWLEDGMENT. It may be one of our hard work, of our achievement, of our perseverance, of our virtue, of our good deeds, of our service for other creatures in earth, etc.

When we already come to the point of realizing this in our life, that's good. That's called AWAKENING. You're awake so that you can control of your ego. Admit that your ego is there and take control of it afterwards. Don't let it run wildly and crash everything in our life.

When we have arrived to this point, we may form an acceptance that our hard work, our achievement and so on may not be acknowledged and praised as we think they deserve but we realize that we must keep going forward and consistent and fully concentrate on our path, regardless of other people's opinion on us.

And then the mind game  with ego never ceases. It follows us wherever we go.

So we may think that we no longer need all the praises, and admiration and acknowledgment we valued highly previously. But now we have to be cautious as well, cautious of the possibility that we mistake ENJOYMENT for HAPPINESS.

Why so? Because enjoyment is never ending. It's like drinking sea water to quench your thirst. It's a vicious circle of addiction which seems okay, less dangerous but in the long run is equally destructive.

Let's define what ENJOYMENT is. It's something that your ego desires and once you obtain that, we feel 'high'. This is where our ego takes control. Because if what we feel is a real happiness, why then are we addicted to it?

So how can we differentiate between enjoyment and happiness?

ENJOYMENT is like drugs, basically. It causes addiction. When you cannot get it, you get restless. Suddenly you think something is wrong but you don't know why exactly the reason is. This also explains why you feel bad for yourself whenever you cannot share things.

If you allow yourself to contemplate (and meditation helps us a lot to find this tendency), we may discover the root of the 'problem'. It is the notion that GIVING IS ALWAYS BETTER THAN ACCEPTING. We've been preached about it from our childhood regardless of our faiths and religious beliefs. Givers may not get any tangible benefits but most givers are prone to the idea that givers are higher than accepters.

That comes down to this overly subtle idea:

"I AM BETTER THAN THOSE ACCEPTING MY GIVINGS..."

That's it!

Now we know that our ego resurfaces between the cracks of our heart, catching us off-guard. Damn!

But don't be too sad. Because naturally, ego follows us till the last day we breathe in this world.

This is our constant battle control of our ego. Ego, therefore, is NOT something to fight against. No matter how hard we try to combat it, it's always there. So rather than trying so hard to conquer it, why can't we embrace it with one condition that they're under our Self control?

It's our homework until we die to fully comprehend that in this life, there is finally no once can give or accept or nothing can be given or accepted. It's all nothingness. It's just VOID. When we experience nothingness, that's when we really can embrace our ego and that ego vanishes, imerses in that nothingness as well. (*/ AkhlisPenulis@gmail.com)